When we are afraid we don’t account ourselves are the ones who create the feeling of fear, that we experience it and then want to not repeat. Read more here: Bristol Stool Scale. The same happens with the pleasant experiences, ourselves the very few times do and when we look at we do it in a way critical, look to people locking us in his personality, his appearance his way of dressing, but we never look at ourselves. If observasemos ourselves we would see our mind always this chatter with itself, in a coming and constant thoughts. This chatter is incessant and unnecessary, since thinking should use it only when needed, the same as the legs or hands, when one is sitting does not need legs to move, but mind you already are standing, sitting, lying, awake or sleeping, he is tirelessly working. The problem is that we are not owners of ourselves because we identify ourselves with thoughts, allowing that it dominates our lives to such an extent that we cannot be ourselves for one single moment. Being oneself is to live without thoughts, be like a child without prejudices, without condemning, without accepting, or rejecting anything, free of any conditioning either this social, cultural, political, religious etc.
Thinking is memory and memory is of the past, this is the reason why we always go ahead or we are left behind, we are always thinking in what we did or what we do, we never live the present active, the here and now. Live the here and now, be aware, the awakening of the consciousness, be attentive, the tao, the way, is all the same, different words to define one thing, that is meditation. Be attentive is to be observant, watchful, witness of everything what is happening both internally as externally. To listen there must be an interest and a silent observation, one can not be attentive if you’re constantly prattling with himself.