Love seeks nothing, wants nothing, needs nothing, no “shoulds.” So when I hear people say they love someone and want to be loved in return, they are not talking about love. They are talking about something different. ” Belief 3: I need to win the love and approval of others This is one of the most painful beliefs about relationships. Note how you live your life when you look for love and approval?. We are afraid of being alone and modify our behavior to gain the attention of another person and to win her love. We change our behavior to avoid rejection or criticism. By changing who we are someone we become inauthentic. Hide aspects of ourselves for fear that others will judge or not like.
We put on a mask and live in fear to discover who we really are. We do things we do not want to please others. And this is a very painful and stressful life, pretending to be who we are not This belief leads to a false life and stressful. Look now how would you live if you did not believe you need to win the love and approval of others?: You could enjoy being who you are, you feel comfortable, giving to others as you are, doing and saying what you feel in every moment. When we free ourselves from a belief like this, we can let go of fears of being who we are. We are real, honest and relaxed in the relationship. It makes it easy express love and be happy again, regardless of what others say or think. Belief 4: My partner has many flaws.
What if I told you that the apparent shortcomings of your partner bother you that both are an opportunity for self-knowledge? The others are a reflection of our thoughts and creencias.a Byron Katie says, “Once we start to question our thoughts, our partners are always our greatest teachers. There are no mistakes about the person you are, he or she is the perfect teacher for you, whether or not the relationship work for you, once you start to question your thoughts, you start to see this clearly. There is no error in the universe. So if your partner is upset, either. If there is something about him that you consider a flaw, well, because these defects are yours, you’re projecting those, and you can write, question, and be free. People go to India to find a guru, but you do not have to: you are living with one. Your partner will give you everything you need for your own freedom. “To develop healthy relationships, loving and respectful is required to identify those beliefs we have about love, relationships and our partner and dissolve these judgments and beliefs. For this you can use the process of Byron Katie, four simple questions can help you rid of those beliefs that prevent you from enjoying your relationship and above all of your relationship with yourself. When you question your beliefs stressful your partner becomes a very important in your journey of self-discovery. Sandra a Iozzelli specializes in helping others to reduce negative emotions, stress, fear and limiting beliefs in their lives.